So I ordered some lingerie

Lingerie

I love buying my lingerie in person. Only once I've gone to an actual clothes shop and bought two pairs of g-strings, one pair still remains in use, the other got so cummy that I had to throw it away... Another time I ordered from a Finnish sex shop online, because they had a lovely selection, even though I couldn't be perfectly sure of the fit.

All the other times I've gone to a porn shop, wandered around in evergrowing lust, which is, as we all know, incredibly dangerous to your bank balance! Funnily enough the porn shops in the centre of Helsinki are few in numbers and even worse in their lingerie selection as far as my very personal taste is concerned.

That forced me to try something else out. Something that had a potential of incredible variety of selection, with a varying set of attributes I could filter stuff out, like "colour" and "size: XL" as I'm not a small girl, especially in women's sizes XD I guess you all know where I went - Amazon. The sheer amount of redness made my head spin and I had the typical problem: so much that I wanted, so little I could safely hide. Instead of maxing out my credit card I opted for a single set of hotness.

My loot

Red corset with garter belt and a thong and thigh-high socks. Simply amazing! I just cannot make it look as sexy as this blonde model here... but that's all right by me, I'm not doing this for anyone else's pleasure but my own. Though I am dying to show it off to some fellow sissies...

The thought of taking off my outer layer of stupid, useless male clothing, revealing Johanna underneath, is just so hot that I get an instant hard-on. Right now I just don't have anyone to show it to live. Or I could, technically, but I'm me so it's not that easy and simple ;)

Second hookup with more first times

After the first hookup we had talked more, obviously. She wanted to get fucked, basically :p And I wanted to be groped around, her pushing me on the bed and then lying on top of me, rubbing her hard clit against my butt. Not a rape fantasy as I'm not into that but a safe and predetermined way of feeling how it's to be overpowered. Somehow. I just wanted to know how it feels when someone's hard because of you :3 The rest was going to be made as we went.

Quick shopping

I wanted new g-strings to replace the blacks I had been using lately. Taking the simplest route I just went to a lingerie shop, wandered around and got asked if they could help me somehow. I told what I was looking for, they didn't have exactly that colour but these are what they had and this was so and this so. In the end I got two pairs, a black and a wine red g-string.

Those felt really nice but weren't as slutty and porn-y as I desired, but still good value for money.  I especially adored the way they cupped my smooth shaved balls when I had a cockring on and just plopped my hard clit out for photos or stroking :3

More lesbian playtime

We had our scheduling issues, as in we almost didn't get to meet when we had prepared to meet. It was a Friday, the last possible day in that timeframe. Can't recall why so anymore, but there were reasons. I prepared again by shaving my bits very carefully and lovingly.  Knowing how horny I got the last time I think I should've beaten off that day or earlier on Friday to last somewhat longer, but you all know hindsight... Anyway, I was prepared to be seen girlily again!

Long long day at work

Schedules dictated that we'd meet at two in the afternoon, earlier I couldn't make it (and this was already pushing it for me) and she'd need to go early (as did I). To justify my early disappearance I arrived damn early. The hours were long and kinda painful as I couldn't really concentrate on anything but the important things...

A bit before two I set out, changed to my black g-string and put one of the rings around my ballsack just because it always feels so nice ;) and it looks kinky to me :3 Just like the previous time I marched to the hotel with all the same feelings of excitement and mild panic! I kept my date up to date in kik so we'd be at the lobby without much extra waiting. That walk is, by the way, always longer than I think and I should reserve enough time.

That hotel again

At the lobby we greeted, went to the lift and straight to the room again. This time I didn't pay attention to the personell and I don't think they paid attention to us, either. She told she'd need a shower and I had immediately started undressing, because I wanted to show my new g-string bulging so sexily. All I can say is that she enjoyed it - and so did I ;)

So, she went to take a quick shower and I played with the outfits. She had brought a body as I had talked about how I had always wanted to try one out. Those aren't good for lesbian dates, but more for "personal enjoyment", we agreed. Felt good though ;)

Dressing up

I asked for her input and she suggested the white corselet. There were, sadly, no stockings to go with it, but that wasn't a big issue. To go with that I put on blue panties that had an inviting open butt. For some reason I also put on a frilly blue microskirt that could be lifted for that much more naughty views :3

Her outfit included blue g-string, which was what I had begged her to do, I just adore g-strings <3

Playtime!

As soon as we were dressed up we started fondling each other. While rubbing our panty bulges together we grouped each other's butts.

Then I dropped on my knees and started again kissing her bulge, teasing it with my lips and slipping my tongue inside for the shaft, the tip and her balls. She moaned lustily and that turned me on even more! I didn't want to waste time and released her clit for sucking and stroking <3<3<3I love sucking cock <3<3<3 I just adore cock <3<3<3 Cooooock <3<3<3

Surprise buttsexxx

When she was even harder and hornier, I got up and rubbed my butt against her superhard clit I whispered "I want to know hot it feels" and meant that she'd do what we had talked about... but it didn't go exactly so.  The hardon against my ass felt sexy but then I heard the sound of the lube bottle opening and soon after her finger entered my boypussy :o She pushed me down on the bed, I assumed the position and waited in a kind of a scared but excited state of mind...

I felt something hot and hard against my butt. Then she pushed her clit in, it didn't quite hurt but felt strange. She settled herself lying on my back and whispered in my ear that "it's all the way in now, honey" and I couldn't do much more than mumble incoherently. I had lost my anal virginity <3 For a while she fucked me from behind, I moaned. After a while she asked if she should pull out and I said yeah. I got up and pushed her sitting on the bed.

Ride like the wind

My idea was just so sit on her lap like a good girl and then do something, but that hard clit and her position called me in a different direction. I climbed on top of her, with her lubed clit poking at my pussy. She asked if I was sure of this and I replied that "fuck yeah I am sure!"

I aimed her clit on the lips of my pussy and pushed my ass down on it. Just like with a buttplug or a dildo, I impaled myself on her delicious clit <3<3<3<3<3 When it was all in me I was moaning again in lust :3 I leaned forward, fondled her tits and started riding slowly... but increasing the speed a bit. I have to admit that I'm not used to such movements so my leg started hurting a bit and I had to reposition somewhat. That's not something you see in porn, but this was real life :p

Anyway, I rode her and was somewhat noisy because it was so good. She sucked my clit and I just couldn't take something like this for long. I exhaled "I'm coming", she said "don't cum yet" but "I can't stop it anymore.." so she just dove in and sucked me even more furiously, I came and shot a good load of cum in her mouth! I got complimented for having a huge load of tasty cum *blushes*

Well... what next? After cumming I went limp and as I've said, I typically don't get up for a second round quickly. She fucked me more, from different angles and all, so that I got fucked properly and for real :o I moaned a lot, asked "gently, gently" a good bunch of times while getting it.

For the record I have to say that it didn't hurt per se, but her clit was large-feeling for me. She said that I apparently wasn't used to cock at all as she's not that well hung. Not how it felt to me! :p Getting fucked didn't, this first time at least, make me crave for it or love it. It just kinda was. I was being fucked. By a gurl <3

The other first time

Being afraid of the mess of cum flowing from my pussy for hours, I asked her to stop and then I went down on her again, working against my own "I'm not that horny anymore, I can't suck too well now" thing and it worked <3 As I've said, I really like giving head and pretty quickly I noticed that I had got hard again <3 She appreciated that, kissed my clit lovingly and put my cockring on so that I'd also stay hard :3 

With a bit more cocksucking arousing me I said I'd fuck her now if she wanted and boy, did she want it! <3 She lubed my clit and started riding me <3 

That was lovely especially as I could also suck / slurp / lick her clit periodically <3<3<3<3 I had never had any anal before so it was a very new experience for me :3

More than a mouthful

We tried a few positions, in addition to her riding me. Somehow I didn't do all that I'd always fantasized of doing but I guess that was because I, as I keep saying, wasn't my horniest anymore.

Didn't cum a second time, though, but a part of the reason could be that the ring I had on was the middle one (that I use around my sack or just on the shaft, in front of the balls) and it was damn tight, maybe numbing me too much. So I had to quit and just go down on her again <3<3<3<3

I sucked, stroked, licked and kissed her clit, I worshipped it like the cockhungry slut I was <3<3<3 Maybe she was near already, but pretty soon she moaned that she's about to cum and that obviosly made me work harder on her :3 Remembering a porn thing I slowly drooled some spit on the tip of her clit, then spread that all around with my tongue, kept stroking, sucked, licked, kissed, stroked, sucked and... had her explode in my mouth with such force that cum flew all around... it surprised me. Oops.

That was it for the second hookup, who knows what happens the next time :3 But I do have more stuff I want to try out!

Animated pics showing my deep, horny desires

My horniness has reached new levels again :) I bought new panties, cockring, fishnet stockings and a butt plug just a couple of weeks ago or so. I have enjoyed them at work a couple of times! Let's just say that bus trips are interesting when plugged in ;) Maybe I'll show a pic or tow later ^_^

That said I want more and more to get to play with another girl! The only limitation is that I can only meet up and get going is at Keltainen Ruusu or US Video, or something like that. Those places are also known of their cruising areas which is quite a turnon <3

Complaining really helped

Wow! Complaining seems to have helped me. Things started moving at a scary pace and now I'm facing my short freedom. I could almost hold my breath until its beginning now!

Lingerie!

Of course I arranged some things, with care, so that I could pop by a couple of select boutiques over a couple of afternoons. Now I own lingerie again! Not just those black panties but a corselet, stayups and .. hm, a couple of other things. I even bought a wig from a costume shop! That doesn't make me look girly enough but that's life of a not-girly guy, right?

Once I had all my stuff (so far, mind you, I'm not done yet!) bought I managed to try them out. It was rushed and all but still, I was turned on so hard it wasn't even funny anymore. What I was could only be described horrrrrny as fuck <3 I wore my tight panties, the corselet, stay-ups and the wig. Mmmmmmh :)

A teaser

Now I just need to wait a bit so I get to enjoy all this with ample time, without any rush. And I'm gonna need some more stuff as I hinted before. Cockrings and two more toys at least. Then we're good to go for something at least. Oh, and t-porn, gigabytes of t-porn, there's no going around that requirement for good girly time ;) Maybe I'll even get a real (not a smartphone) camera handy... teeheehee :)

New panties!

Panties!

As my black g-string has ended up being somewhat cummy, I thought I'd need a new pair *blush* Of course I tried to get whore-red ones, but luck wasn't with me. The next best thing was black and I took them just as eagerly. These new ones have a string of beads in the front, for the girls to enjoy between their lips. I use them as a cockring approximation <3 The fabric's lovely, soft and feels so good against my hard clit <3 Actually, I have to take playing easy to avoid cumming way too soon ;)

Sorry, still not showing my smooth but noticeable bulge to you here ;)

Yeah.... oh yeah!

Toyshopping

I did buy a buttplug and some cockrings becaues I desired them so badly... To make things even more interesting, I've worn them at work too. So very naughty and so very exciting ;)

First go

I was chatting online with another girlie and I told her that I had taken my brand-spanking-new plug with me just so I could tell her about it. She was excatic and urged me to plug myself asap! Circumstances being what they were, I had to wait and then it took time.

First, of course, I went to the bathroom with my heart in my throat. Locked all doors I could lock and took quietly my shoes and pants off. With my own saliva I lubricated the plug and as it has a suction cup in the bottom, put its tip against my moistened hole and the other end onto the wall. Leaning forward and pushing backward I was first penetrated and then filled up slowly and deliciously.



Maybe you can imagine how difficult it was to keep noises down ;) Of course I didn't just push it straight in but fucked it inside me, feeling very slutty. Especially when my buttcheeks hit the wall repeatedly. When I felt it was enough for the time being, I pulled up my g-string and headed back to my place, walking slowly and carefully.

And then...

I then told her and she loved to hear about it and was so turned on that I did such a thing for her. Took pics, even, but I'm not sharing all that here... At some point I noticed that I could take the plug out a bit and ride it on my chair. As long as no one would notice! That was sweet and damn sexy. My lady friend got so heated up in the end that she went for her own plug and panties and was making them wet with precum within minutes!

Finally, after a lenghty and naughty chat session we both headed towards our toilets for release. Myself, I first backed up against the wall and refucked myself with my plug and then sat on the toilet seat, facing backwards, riding the plug like mad! I had at first tried to put on my cockrings, but after putting on the largest one around my sack, the next one that's supposed to go to the base of the shaft, barely went over the head... So I had to leave 2/3 of my rings off.

Didn't matter, I came like the oldest of the faithfuls <3 Took a bit to clean up my mess but I was the second to last to leave work that day, it was safe. Phew.

Just so you know, I'm plugged, cockringed and wearing my precummy black g-string right now while I'm writing this. And telling you is such a turn-on ;)

Workplace naughtiness increases

Yeah... I'm wearing my g-string at work yet again. I love it.
Now I just feel like I should be plugged, too. But I don't own a plug because for some stupid reason I didn't buy one when I bought these knickers. I guess I'm just stupid or I didn't think I'd get to this again.
I was wrong.

Something like this could be very nice ;)

I'm horny. I need things, badly. Right now.

Pretty redness sighted!

I want and need this set <3

Shopping desires are resurfacing again

My displeasure with that black set I got earlier this year has only grown as time has passed. Not that the black stockings or the garter belt is bad or anything, they just aren't red. And as I have complained, the g-string isn't what I went for ;)

After a bit of googling

This is what I found from a sex shop that's pretty handily acessible to me. A nice set in red!

Front view

And the rear view

The funny thing is that at least the online catalogues of all the sex shops in Helsinki have very few sets nowadays... the lists used to span pages and pages, now not so much. And I have absolutely no clue, why. Of course the online-only shops have better selections but at the moment those aren't what I go for.

Plans

I'd love to get this set for me, I miss wearing red so much. Of course it'd be beyond wonderful to show myself to someone in sexy red lingerie <3 To begin with ;)
Maybe I'll pop by that shop someday soon, even... Meanwhile I'll just keep daydreaming of me being in that pic.

A couple of items I got

Hello everyone :) As I said in my earlier post, I did go for some quick shopping. Actually it was the same afternoon! Because I didn't have much time and the weather was awful, I could only visit one sex shop. One.
That shop had been a very good source of toys and outfits before but it had recently changed ownership. Somehow only the outfit racks were noticeably affected... to a slightly worse status.

Shopping round going wrong
So I went to the shop and strolled around, as shyly as always. Somehow, even if I know that no one's paying attention to me because they have their own business to attend to, I feel shy. Shy and excited. Walking around interesting items and very nice looking sexy outfits turns me on visibly.

Yeah, I have a hardon most of the time, what can I do? :P There weren't many other customers anyway, so it didn't matter much. I kept going around, searching.

Naturally as I had composed my list just before, I knew what kind of stuff I was looking for. None of those exact items were findable! Absolutely none of them and this is one of the biggest sex shops in the city (I think). I was somewhat disappointed. No red sexy lingerie in the whole place. How can that happen? For real?

A fellow xdresser was around <3
During my wandering I noticed that someone came out of the "special" door in the back. Wearing a silvery vinyl miniskirt and a top, a curious hairdo and makeup. It didn't take too many milliseconds to realize that she was like me but in action. She went straight to some toys, close to where I was. She smelled of of lubricant and that got both my mind and blood racing :D Being my shy self I was admiring her from afar and after a way too short while at the toy rack she went back in.

I've never been there myself, though what I've heard and read it's a place where older men stroll around afternoon and younger people go in the evening. Among other things. Had I had the time (and the daring), I'd gone after her to see what she was up to. Looking at her disappearing ass I was wishing I dared to do the same, to dress up and go somewhere... But, in the end, I'm a shy coward :(

A hasty backup set
My time was somewhat limited so I couldn't stay there all day and I wanted, no, needed to get something. I went through the aisles again, looking for similar stuff that was close enough to what I had daydreamed about. Somehow they didn't seem to have a single set of corselets, which I found really confusing. None of the bodies looked hot to me, so I had to give up that part for now. In the end I found a small set that consisted of a black vinyl garter with straps and black long socks. Not bad, not bad. To accompany that set I went for a black thong. Black is almost as good as red, but it still isn't red.

The accessory department
I skipped the butt plug shelves completely because on my initial round I hadn't seen anything I really, really liked. So to the accessories I went. They had a few different types of cockrings. Some of those I had tried but disliked a lot for various reasons. Of course they didn't have the thing I had wanted, that'd been a bit too nice I guess :P In the end I decided to give a try to those triple rings. Three separate rings made of semirigid material. The one I had wanted would've had two so I thought that I could use two out of three and achieve the result I wanted, no? I got that so I can say I've tried.

These items I bought and took home with me. I unpacked them with trembling hands and took a couple of pics so I could share what I got. And then I tried them out :)

I felt good in the garter and socks, but the thong was a bit on the tight side for me... Which is a huge pity. Not that I keep them completely on for long, anyway ;) The rings weren't too bad, I just have to learn how to use them properly. There are a couple of photos I managed to take before I got carried away and made a huge mess on my body ;)


Someday I'll go and get some more lingerie to go with that garter of mine. And I guess I must get a new thong as well... I just hope and dream I'd get to wear them with someone. A someone who's also dressed up like a slut <3

I want to go shopping!

As I said earlier, my collection was purged away. Both lingerie and toys. *sigh* Such is life and it happens... sadly. And it has happened to me a couple of times over the years, it may happen again, who knows?

The initial list contents
Everyone knows that one of the important aspects of shopping for anything (grocery shopping is a very good example), you should have a list. Without a proper list you may forget to buy what you wanted and buy stuff you didn't really need or even want in the first place.

I'll start the list-making process by thinking of what I want and need. There's no way I'll get all of that on one go, so this needs to be simple. Hmmm...
Well, lingerie is obviously the thing for me, so it goes on the list ;) Of course I'll need a toy or two to go with it, so there you go too! Cockrings are something I adore and enjoy, so I'll add it to the list as well as some lube.

• Lingerie
• Toys
• Accessories

Iterating through the list
The only problem with this list is that "lingerie" is a somewhat broad concept, so I'll need to open it a bit, otherwise I'll have a warderobeful that I can't store anywhere. Hihi :) No matter how much I enjoy that idea, it's not feasible.
So far I've found corselets very sexy and comfy. I like them a lot more than plain (although cute) bras, for example. Most of the corselets I know have the garter straps included, but if they don't, a garter belt would be needed. Yesssss... Obviously the garter straps need to be attached to something, thigh-high socks preferably. I love those things, too. All of them, at the same time. It's just a wonderful combination: a corselet, garters and thigh socks. Mmmmmmm..

I had one of these sets before, it's wonderful

Hmmmh. Something's missing...

Oh yes! The g-string! I'm not such a fan of garter belts with an attached thong-part, I like them all as separate entities that build the complete setup. A nice g-string to go with the rest, that'll do <3 And the dominating color shall be red <3 Let's see what I've managed to write down so far, shall we?

• Lingerie, red, size L (Eur)
  
  • A corselet
  • Garter belt if needed
    
    
  • G-String
    
    
  • Thigh-high socks
    
    
    
• Toys
• Accessories

While the list is not ready...
That's fine by me, most definitely fine. Next thing to be checked is the "toys" section. There are several things I'd like to have but I may have to take it easy... just like with my lingerie. What could be the bare essentials?

Wisened from my previous experiences, I don't think I'll dare to go for a dildo again :P It was almost the size of my own cock and damn if I could get anything in... This time I shall keep to a different, smaller, type of penetrators. But not as tiny as some of the things I had before. A not-minuscule buttplug could be a very, very interesting thing. I could keep it in while doing other things... Sounds good to me. Especially if it vibrates. With many programs.

Maybe...

This one has 10 programs but I've never found it in a shop myself...

One thing's certain: I love things that go bzZZzrrrrzzzZZZrzrzrzrzZZZ! in random ways instead of just one constant, even numbing BZZZZZZZZ. That preference of mine makes it a bit difficult sometimes, though. So I'll add two items on the list: a plug for wearing and vibrator for lust-buildup. Yeah, that works just nicely for me ;)

• Lingerie, red, size L (Eur)
  
  • A corselet
  • Garter belt if needed
  • G-String
  • Thigh-high socks
• Toys
  
  • Buttplug, medium-small
  • Buzzing multiprog vibrator
• Accessories

Handle the next item
Accessories are easy peasy. I want, need and require a cockring! There's no way around it. One bored afternoon at work I was checking for online stores and noticed that the selections vary heavily. I've tried a few different types: those you tighten yourself, solid plastic rings, many different silicone rings and a weird sleeve. They don't work in my use too well, as I've said before.
If the thing goes around the shaft only, it's not as cool as something that goes around the balls as well. The usual solution seems to be a metallic thing, no thanks or similar. I like the silicone ones for some reason. Some of the ball-touching rings do some stretching as well and it didn't look comfy at all :S Maybe they are just what I'd enjoy but I don't know and I'm a bit reserved about such things.
But luckily I found a silicone double-ring somewhere and I want it! I need it! :D

The vibrator is completely unnecessary

What else? Lube, that's also needed, but that's simple and doesn't require heavy pondering :) Last time I had a fake mouth (a cheap fleshlight-like thing) for some good old-fashioned meat-hiding, now I'm not sure if  a new one is needed... I've had a couple of different types, none of them has been too special. Meh.

• Lingerie, red, size L (Eur)
  
  • A corselet
  • Garter belt if needed
  • G-String
  • Thigh-high socks
• Toys
  
  • Buttplug, medium-small
  • Buzzing multiprog vibrator
• Accessories
  
  • Cock and balls ring
  • Lube

And it's done!
Yay, the list is done! Now I just need to find all this...

New year, new plans and some old thoughts and feelings shared for the first time

Happy 2012, everyone!

Sadness
There are a couple of pics I took a couple of months ago but I haven't got the courage to post them yet. As I guess many if not all have experieced it, I went and Purged after that set of photos :( I have to clarify that I was in no way ashamed or regretful of what I am and what I do, the reason was purely practical: moving.

Being in a relationship and living in a not-so-huge apartment presents certain problems regarding my crossdressing. I guess you know how it goes :) So, because we're moving, I knew that I might end up being caught and I sure as hell am not ready for that yet. Maybe I never will be ready to come out.

That's the main reason. I don't want to get caught.
My secondary reason is that my outfits were a bit on the dirty side after many, many uses. The toys were also pretty much used and some of them broken... all my cockrings were made of this soft, stretchy material and each and every one of them have broken. I guess the way I use them is a bit rough on them :P And my only real dildo was a bit too big for me and I never got it in, so it was a bit of a useless item for me :(

Too much information?
I've said it before and will keep saying it: I dress up because I like it. I feel sexy as fuck and just thinking of putting on a g-string makes me hard as fuck, very, very quickly... Whenever I dress up, I prance around, ogle at my lingeried body in the mirror and enjoy it thoroughly. There's always some nice trans-porn (crossdressers, bisexual orgies and all sorts of transpeople together or separately) playing on the background, mostly for the sounds. Hearing people please each other while feeling and looking sexy myself is an even bigger turn-on. In a way I'm just building up my horniness.

Sometimes, when I feel like it, I take out my tripod and a camera for some photos. If I don't feel like the hassle, I just take a couple of pics with my phone. Somehow that also makes me hornier. A lot hornier.

This is all some sort of self-teasing I guess. Maybe others do stuff like this, maybe almost everyone. Maybe just a few of us. I wouldn't know :) It's all about building up the feeling, I want to be horny as fuck and look and feel super slutty.

The feeling I go for
If, at this point, I had someone there with me, I'd be up for just about anything... I'd beg for cock. I'd serve my master. I'd swallow his cum and I'd ride his throbbing cock with the greatest of pleasures. Damn, I'd be a slut for a bunch of guys!
Yeah, I desire to be a slut for a (small) group of guys. I know and acknowledge that this is purely from all the porn I've watched ;) You know how it goes, one in the mouth, then I have two hands and an ass, so four dudes could be somehow serviced at the same time <3 And this is one of the what I fantasize about when I'm dressed up, watching/listenting to some awesome hardcore porn. Either a group or just a single someone, a dude or another crossdresser or a real pre-op transsexual, I don't care who, as long as they or (s)he wants me. And who want me as badly as I want to be theirs for taking.

But...
Because I'm just playing with myself, I put on a cock ring, twist it so that it goes like a figure of eight, one loop around my ballsack and the other wrapping the shaft of my hard cock. The tightness feels wonderful and it arouses me even more. Then I get my toys and lube. I used to start with a thin anal buzzer with ~7 modes. Usually I had it on random. It was for extra arousal, and for "opening" me a bit. Meanwhile I was sucking on the dildo or the next anal toy, making it sloppy and ready for insertion. That was a small transparent penis-shaped thingy with a boring vibrator (it was just a solid "bzzz", without any programs or variation). That I used to fuck myself a bit, slowly and carefully.
At this point I am usually almost blind with lust and I can't really take it slowly anymore... Usually I just had to beat off furiously and come on myself.

Highlights
Sometimes I've managed to hold on. My latest toy was a black "anal screw", a ~12cm long wobbly carrot-shaped thing with screw-things (I don't actually know how to call them in english) on the surface and a ring-shaped handle in the end. That one loved to be drilled in slooooooooowly... and then pulled out just to be drilled back in. All the way. It felt wonderful. The only complaint I have is that it had no vibrator because it was a bit too soft (as in non-rigid) to be used as a dildo, because it bent so easily. So I couldn't fuck myself with it in a rapid fashion. If I got to keep doing that for a while, I occasionally came explodingly just because of it, without touching my dick at all.

Depending on how I felt and how stretchy I was feeling, I tried to go for some autofellatio. Seeing a hard cock in front of me, with a porny g-string and socks connected to a garter belt is a very, very hot thing.. even if it's my own cock and outfit ;) I'd of course love to have someone else's body, but what can you do in a closet? :P Autofellatio, when I've done it, has been pretty curious. Usually I just stroke it, fondle the balls, lick the glans, suck it and lick the shaft itself a bit. The position is just a bit uncomfy so I've never treated me to it that often. Depending on how I feel, I come either in my mouth - and swallow everything, of course - or on my face or chest. The more tired I am, the lower I shoot, because I may not be able to keep my position long enough. At least it doesn't get boring ;) Whenever I've shot my load on my chest/belly, I usually smear the cum around and keep stroking a bit, to milk every single drop out.

Endgame
When I've finally come, I generally lose the lust pretty much quickly. I don't know how to call it, but it's a shame it happens and usually so quickly and always way too soon. I'd love to just lie there, feeling full in my ass and satisfied... maybe keep at it for a second round even... But no, when the lust and horniness withdraw, I kinda want to get clean quickly. That may have something to do with the fact that I don't want to make a mess on the sofa, not to get caught of having sperm stains all around.
Maybe the next time I have a good free evening or a day even, I build up my sluttiness again and choose a better place (or cover up better) so I could enjoy the after-the-orgasm moments a bit more, in peace and with time :) But then again, I'd need new outfits and toys for that... many new outfits and toys... :D

Future plans
My old favourite porn shop in Helsinki (Beate Uhse) has closed its doors in its old location for some unexplained reason and I don't think they have moved anywhere else, so I don't have much hope for shopping there in the near future... And the others don't have as awesome a collection, though the Yellow Rose isn't bad at all, but it's still so different. Maybe Amazon helps me with its "this is a gift"-shipping and discreet boxes? I have to check :) I've got direct mail from a porn shop once and that wasn't fun at all.

A promise or two to be more exact
I'll promise to do my best to gather all my courage. To post a pic or two here. In case anyone cared, that is :) As my second promise I say that I'll update this blog a bit better this year <3